Xippy Doodles

Goodbye little blog.

2008-07-10T09:14:00.004-04:00

Well, not really. I've kinda switched over to my Myspace blog. But even there, I went two months without posting a god damned thing.

I wasn't going to post here ever again, but something made me come here this morning. I don't know why.

So I have four tarantulas now. I got another one and the little baby rose hair died.
:(

Whatever, I guess.

I suppose this will be my final entry in this blog.

Goodbye little blog. I will come and visit you often, but I seriously doubt I will post here again.

So here we are nearing the end of March and I have two new Tarantulas.

2008-03-24T16:36:00.002-04:00

I was perusing some tarantula hobbist forums. And cripes, they're right. Tarantulas are like frigging potato chips. Once you have one, you want more. I only ordered one from Krazy 8's but he sent me a baby rose hair as a free gift. She's miniscule! I've had larger crickets before.Here are some pictures.

I haven't named either one yet. So now I have three tarantulas.

As you can see, even the other tarantula is smaller than Milla. It's a Chilean Dwarf Gold. Unlike Milla, this one is quicker on the move and a bit skittish. It's non-aggresive though and I was able to pick it up. However it has a tendency to move a lot around the cage after being handled before it settles down. So I'll be handling it about as often as Milla, which is infrequently.

It fed readily 24 hours after I got it.

The little baby hasn't eaten yet. I am getting her some tiny crickets tonight. hopefully she can feed. I'm worried that she will die.

We went and saw Devildriver on Saturday. Got to meet them and take pics with them again. It was fan-fucking-tastic.

I am really starting to think seriously about shooting a clown. Sounds like a grand time.

Till I think about posting again.

Yeah. Hi.

2008-03-13T12:55:00.000-04:00

Yeah, yeah yeah. So I haven’t updated my blog in a month.

I’ve gotten bored with it, and no one cares about or reads it but me.

Not very interesting.

2008-02-09T16:16:00.000-05:00

I guess, all in all, I am not realy all that interesting. I'm not a main character, an antagonist, protaganist, villain, hero, anti-hero, nothing.

I'm the NPC. The one in the book that has one line and no name. The one who is like, "Oh. It's over there." and immediatly forgotten because my crucial addition to the scene is concluded.

I don't know. I'm not really down about it. I've sat around and thought about ways to make myself more intresting. I don't really know how. I'm kinda quiet if I don't know everyone, and extremely obnoxious if I do know everyone. It's always extremes. It's never a good median.

Ah well. I can't be everything. I can't be what you or that person over there wants me to be. I can try, but why bother?

I'm content enough. I like hugging my cats. That's always good. Sometimes I feel as if it's all I have to talk about, that is my swarth of strange animals. Most women would shriek at them, kill them or get someone else to kill them. They wouldn't be willing to pick up a 3 inch cockroach and say, "HI BELLA." and give it a kiss.They wouldn't be able to poke at a tarantula or let one crawl up thier arm towards their face and be more concerned with the animal falling off and hurting itself than anything else.

But I still don't think as it being unique. It's my normalcy. I wake up in the morning and after my morning routines are done, I go downstairs and turn on the light for the toad, and make sure all the critters have their water and food for the day. Then I make my lunch (or sometimes if I'm too lazy, a can of soup gets thrown into my purse.)

I know my coworkers don't really know much about me. Some of the ones that talk to me more know I'm a bit off, a little weird. Is it stupid that I'm proud when I can make people raise their eyebrow at me or think I am strange? I don't know why I like that so much.

Been meaning to update

2008-01-30T16:50:00.000-05:00

Just keep forgetting.

Vegas was awesome. Had a lot of fun. Lost 3 pounds there. ;o

I also got sick on the last day. There will be plenty of pics uploaded from the trip. You can has a see at them HEER

We didn't get to go to any shows. I really wanted to. :(

Anyway um I bought a Wii from a co-worker. he already brought the unit in. I am getting his money tomorrow.

So I now have a Wii. Wonnnnnnderful. Lul.

Um. I can has go home now?

Vegas is a reality now.

2008-01-09T09:14:00.000-05:00

We're really going. We have tickets!

I never consider a trip to be actually there until the tickets are purchased.

I can't wait! Hotels haven't been booked, but there's availability all over the place out there, so we're just going to check into Circus Circus when we get there.

We have all these plans. Gondola rides at the Venetian. Monty Python's Spamalot! Buffet food! Morning workouts at the gym! ROOM SERVICE! We're even taking Guitar Hero with us. *MEEDLYWEEEMEEMEEMEEMEEMEELYMOOWAOWWAOWWAOWSCREECH!*

I know you like that guitar solo I just did for you. I'm pretty much stuck between hard and expert. I am stuck on the 8th tier, Hard in GH3 and I think the 4th tier, Expert in GH2.

Oh my god. I have to get my nails and toes done before we go!

And my eyebrows waxed, though I plucked them (ow) right before the Christmas dinner, so they're just at the right length to be forcibly pulled out of my face by some hot wax by a smiling woman.

HOLY FUCK. SO MUCH TO DO. SO MUCH TO SEE.

I wonder if I should get my legs waxed before I go. Just my lower legs so I don't have to shave. That would be fun. I'll have to get it done next week though. I just shaved this morning!

I'm going to Vegas!

2008-01-03T16:10:00.000-05:00

Fucking sweet! Nikki and I are going by ourselves.

We're going to lose our minds out there. :D

Same Shit, Differnet Year.

2008-01-01T19:15:00.000-05:00

Welcome to 2008.

Got drunk at Jaci and Rick's last night.

Had a great time. :D

Fine. Fine. Merry Holidaymas.

2007-12-23T02:01:00.000-05:00

Wtf. Why is it here? It feels like it should be around thanksgiving time. This year went too quickly.

Slow down.

I am at mom and Dan's place. We're going to his sister's house tomorrow/later today to celebrate Christmas with his family and doing the Warren thing on X-Mas day.

Yehaw. I hope I enjoy New Years. I should go play some more Guitar Hero even though I just noticed it's 2 in the morning.

What should I blog about?

2007-12-16T13:13:00.000-05:00

Should I talk about MYSPACE DRAMA?

Should I talk about SEX?

Should I talk about the AWESOME BREAKFAST THAT NIKKI MADE ME THIS MORNING?

Should I talk about NOT BEING SOBER ALL WEEKEND?

Should I talk about FISCAL REPORTS?

Whatever. Draw your own conclusions.

I think I should have a baby. :)

Fuck you Metro.

2007-12-14T09:11:00.000-05:00

Just...fuck you.

Fine. Take my fucking extra $228 a year for your still shittier than ever service. I'd swear to god that I hate Metro if I wasn't a faithless heathen.

Here I sit, at 4:50

2007-12-10T16:44:00.000-05:00

Seems like it should actually be 2:00.

I am not ready to fight with the metro and wait for the bus. I am going by Nikki's work tonight instead of going home. That means I can leave a little later than normal.

I just flicked the INSERT key halfway across the office. I put it back on today to amuse.

Fuck I have nothing to talk about. I can't stand the fact that Christmas is two weeks away. I've bought my first two presents. I hate this time of year. I'm always depressed because of the SAD.

We just got our new forms for the annual self review. Since the merger with the other company, the review forms have changed. I pretty much have to type up a brand new review instead of editing and reworking last years. I fucking hate doing my self review. You're supposed to sit around and praise yourself and talk about all the good things you've done in the past year and make yourself seem like you can shit golden eggs stamped with the company logo, but all it does for me is make me realize how stupid and unimportant my job is. Oh whoopdy fucking do, I get to brag about how well I can make the copy machine work. Depressing.

I am however extremely thankful that we don't have to do that stupid shit PDI thing we did last year. I think in general, the entire department gave the whole thing a very negative review and gave everyone they evaluated 5'S down the chart. Not so much as a whisper of it this year. Thank you thank you thank you.

My mother paid my mortgage this month.

2007-12-04T11:07:00.000-05:00

I'll be able to pay my bills down because of it. February will be a triple paycheck month.

I don't know what is going on with my world right now. I had a dream the other night that there was a natural disaster and I couldn't find my cats.

I don't know what the point of this is.

December is almost here.

2007-11-29T09:24:00.000-05:00

And I still have no clue what I should do. I...I don't know.

So much going on. I don't want to start doing my annual review because I got into trouble at work this year...well, not big. They told me to cut back on the internet. I did, and it was acknowledged.

So whatever.

At least we don't have to do that wretched PDI evaluation shit on top of our old evaaluations like last year. I hate that company and I hope they go bankrupt.

How the fuck do they expect me to do a 45 minute evaluation for 17-24 coworkers? I didn't. Most of them I just clicked 5 or EXCELLENT down the list without reading the questions and said, "_______ is a nice person and is always respectful and easy to work with," on the part where you are supposed to say something personal about them.

Lol. It looks like most did the same for me. The only two things listed for improvement suggestions were 'Jaime's desk is messy' and 'Jaime sometimes she makes typos on the main file."

Big deal. Our department's Senior Vice President's desk is just as messy as mine. I know. I walk into her office all the time to hand her settlement documents or put them on her chair if she isn't there.

As for the typo thing, yes. That was a minor issue and it's since been corrected.

Glad I don't have to do that again this year.

I have horrible news.

2007-11-19T14:47:00.000-05:00

Last Wednesday, I cleaned out Petey's tank. I forgot that he wasout and closed the tank and walked away.

I've lost my Petey. I can't find him anywhere.

God this is so depressing.

Too soon for the holidays

2007-11-14T15:28:00.000-05:00

I honestly don't feel like celebrating Christmas this year.

1. Since I am not religious, it's nothing more than a commercial holiday to me.
2. I can't afford to buy presents.

I'm trying to think of a good way to wriggle out of the family gift exchange this year. No one has to buy for me, I don't have to buy for them.

I didn't even have a tree last year...well that's not entirely true. Mom gave me a 2ft. tall fake tree that came predecorated and I put it in the window.

But in all honesty, I just don't care about Christmas.

Happy fucking November.

2007-11-05T21:35:00.000-05:00

I couldn't decide whatto listen to, so I just hit play.

Apparently,the computer decided that I need to listen to Cowboys From Hell. Nice choice, Senor Scrapheap.

My legions of non exsistant readers and fools alike, I can't say that I have missed you. I'm in high spirits right now. I just shit out a fucking sewage truck this weekend, but my spirits aren't dampered by the sudden illness.

So how have you been, little blog? You're almost three years old now. Three whole documented years of my life sprawled across your pages for no one to read. It's a sense of accomplishment sortof. It's a bit of exhibitionism, isn't it? It's here and in the open for people to see. Only one person whom I never wanted to see it saw it, and well I guess that's my fault. So, sorry I guess for that, You Know Who, but you're still a uptight bitch. (:

Qi is getting spayed on Friday. The magically depressing holiday season is closing in on us once more. Maybe I'll make another request for Mr. Grinch to come out and delay it. I don't even want presents. I don't know what I want.

I've been reading romance novels lately. I don't why it makes me roll my eyes. The women in them are always delicious and deliciously complicated. Always slight, perfect with thier perfect lovers and complications that fleshes them to be more than just words.

That doesn't happen to women like me. Sometimes it suits me just fine. Men are trouble. But I do have emotions. It stings sometimes. It passes though.

I should go buy some new clothes. My shit hangs off me like burlap sacks. Not very attractive. I made an effort this summer to change myself at work a bit. Wow. I actually wore skirts and dresses, with heels instead of baggy pants that are inevitably too long for me because my legs are short. It amuses me that so many pant makers assume all overweight women are also 5'11" 1/2 Amazons. Fuck dude.

I have no clue what I am babbling about.

Whatever. (:

I'm in a good mood tonight. Weeds is on in a few minutes so I must be going. Happy November.

Sorry. no update for a while.

2007-10-26T13:04:00.000-04:00

Omg. Bored. I have Monday - Wednesday off next week. Excitement abounds! Going to go see Type o Negative in Philadelphia. Man, fuckyou Peter Johnny Kenny and Josh. They're just avoiding us, but we're all stalkerish and trekking up on a Greyhound to do see them.

So life's been treating me alright. Can't complain. This weekend is mom's last weekend at the Renn Faire.
nikki and I dressed up totally Black Metal last weekend too. We rock. I will end up looking like that for Halloween too.

Don't know what else to say really.

So... I am sitting at work wearing a corset.

2007-10-11T11:27:00.001-04:00

I've spent the past two days at my mother's house in Wheaton, keeping my sister company and making sure she wakes up to get to school while mom and Dan are out of town.

I wore my new corset to the Naglfar/Dark Funeral concert last night with Nikki. (Awesome show by the way.) I stopped by home after work to get my concert clothes, check on my cats and such.

Well we go to the concert! Fun is had! Corset is uncomfortable! Yay!

Nikki drops me off at my mother's. I turn in for the night.

I wake up this morning on the futon in their patio/computer room and look around blearily, after only 5 hours of sleep. Jessi is up and at em and leaves on time.

I'm putzing around, getting ready for work when I make a realization...

I left my bra at home last night. MY home. All the way in Gaithersburg. As you know, I'm a large woman. Large women do not get away with going braless. Ever. Never. Gross!

I have two options.

1. Call out of work sick. (AKA cough into the phone and lie.)
2. Wear the corset to work.

I decided to wear it to work. I get on my skirt and the corset. I unlace it a bit so it's not as tight. Perfect! And I look a bit thinner too.

I put on the shirt I brought with me Tuesday night to wear today.

OH. MY. GOD. The thin material of the shirt while veiling skin and bra, does NOTHING to hide the fact that there is a bright, glaring white strapless corset under my shirt, pushing my boobs up into oblivion. It's not low cut, but it was still a little deviant to wear that shirt with that the corset.

So I call my mother and explain and ask to borrow a shirt. She points me to her closet, which I've already rifled through. I found one. It still looks funny, but it's a little baggier so it's no where near as noticable.

Still. I never want to wear this to work again.

I haven't posted in a while.

2007-10-05T13:55:00.000-04:00

Sorry about that, little blog.

So I went camping last weekend, then helped mom at the PA Renn Faire. I guess I never mentioned that she has a store there this year. 12 weekends and 6 school days. It was kinda cool, but I wouldn't want to doit every weekend. I helped her her out this week for two of the school days.

I also lost one of the roaches. :( RIP Fuckface.

I left the tank open again. Two of them got out overnight, but I managed to find one inside of a stereo speaker after my mother and I heard it crawling on the back of the woofer.

So he's been missing for about 4 days now. I doubt I will ever find him.

The dating front has thrown several wonderful possibilities at me. My spirits are up because the weather is easing to comfortable levels. The house still gets hot if I turn off the AC, which as you know, is completely unacceptable, so it's still running. Grr.

Not much has been happening.

2007-09-21T03:12:00.000-04:00

My tattoo didn't quite heal right. I lost some ink in it. I was more worried about scarring than anything, but I don't think that will happen. I will justhave it touched up and be ready to go.

It's almost done healing.

In other news, Jaci, Ivona and I went to go see Finntroll on Tuesday. I have pics. Awesome.

Jaci got pulled over on the way back and the cop tried his damndest to convince her that she was drunk, and made her blow into the breathalyzer several times while the other cops with him sat around and rolled thier eyes. He initially said that he pulled her over because her tag light was out. I think he initially did, but when he saw how we were dressed, he didn't like it and wanted to prove something. Having nothing to prove, he let us go about 15 minutes later.

I'm up at three in the morning because I fell asleep around 10 and woke up around 1:45. I'm going back to bed shortly. Just thought I would update my invisible legions of readers. This blog is mostly just for me, but I've started advertising it on my myspace again.

I got my first tattoo yesterday!

2007-09-10T14:04:00.001-04:00

Thumbnail.

Nikki also got hers.

I'm going to have a spider on the back of my neck until I die. Kinda cool. :D

I also have a larger one that I am getting next week, which I'm still thinking hard about.

Dude. The bands at this weekend's campout were SICK.

2007-09-03T22:20:00.000-04:00

Absolutely insane show. Seven bands, and camping out for only $5 a head out in West Virginia.

It was so fucking worth it, unlike that lame shit I went to out in PA back in May.

I happily got a demo from a band called Krass Judgement that I was really digging. They put on an amazing show. Later the singer walked up to us and was like, "Hey! Enjoying the show?" and my friend and I were like OMG YOU ALL FUCKING ROCK. SICK ASS SHOW. INSANE! WEEE! He looked pelased with himself and gave us both free CDs.

And the band we went there to see, Dahlgren Prophecy played an awesome show too. Oh so very awesome. My friend is on thier street team, so we got to chill with them.

Later on, we all hung out while everyone had bottlerocket/M80 wars with each other. I didn't shoot any off, but they were hucking them at each other and I had to dogge a few.

My friend and I also went topless streaking with the singer from Dahlgren.

Does anyone else know how weird it is to stand out in a field at 3 in the morning in nothing but your underwear? Gnah...

And I had some fun right before we left. Hee hee.

And I just got my period this morning. Thank you uterus for not deluging me with blood while I was out in the wilderness.

WASSAAAAAAAP?

2007-09-02T00:29:00.000-04:00

I'm sitting here at Nikki's, chilling with a glass of White Zinfandal. We're going camping tomorrow night, just one night. We'll be back in the morning. It's a metalfest campout/concert!

Fucking sweet.

So yeah. I am very hot right now. It's hot up here. Maybe it's just me.

My impromptu 'date' got canceled.

2007-08-31T09:11:00.000-04:00

So I was riding the shuttle back to the Rockville office yesterday when my phone rang. I actually missed the call, but called back immediatly.

Tt was the guy I met at the Devildriver show. We talked for a bit before he suggested that we hang out. I agree. I get to the Rockville office, go upstairs to talk to my mother's office while she finishes something up, then we get in her car and head to my house.

When we get to my house, I get ready, put on a bit of mascara and some lip gloss. He calls me back and I give him directions to the mall, where I agree to meet him. I tell my mother that she can just take off if she wants and that I will just take the bus, but she offers a me a ride over. Sure!

So I get there and I am waiting. Finally, I call him to make sure he isn't lost.

He informs me that his roommate got into a car accident and he was on his way to the hospital. Wow. That sucks.

So I'm not even sure if it was a date. I think we were just going to spend some chill time together.

I'll call him tonight.

Oh. And on an unrelated note, I can now play Guitar Hero II on hard. I'm still getting the hang of it though.

Title.

2007-08-27T10:16:00.000-04:00

Saw Devildriver on Thursday. Met them again, got pictures with them too! The ones with Dez didn't come out, but I'm not too worried. We'll meet them again next time around.

I'm really poor this week. I don't know if I'll be able to afford my bus pass or not. I think I will. I'm getting real tired of buying the 20 trip tickets. I WANT to buy the two week passes, but that comes up with two problems.

- When the hell does the two week period start for them? How do I know that I'm not going to go into the grovery store and pay $10 for a bus pass that's only good for another three days?
- They're always out.

And I think I met a guy, but I think after talking to him on the phone he thinks I am a nut job. He said he'd call me back last night and never did.

Oh well.

And in case you are wondering about the other guy, I broke up with him. He turned out to be rascist and now a lot of people are pissed at me.

My grandfather had his Larnyx removed.

2007-08-16T13:30:00.000-04:00

Last monday, August 6. They are pretty sure they got all of the cancer, but he will never talk again. I'm going to have to become an expert in reading lips.

He's in a lot of pain and annoyed at life in general right now, but he is lucid and alive.

In other news, I've made a final decision on a tattoo. For my birthday, my grandfather drew me a dragon.

I expressed interest in getting it tattooed and at that he was like, "Wait. Wait and let me draw some more."

He drew this awesome chinese dragon wrapped around a flower. I really like it.

He is still saying 'wait and let me draw more,' but we'll see. I don't plan on going to get inked until I find an artist I like.

I will not vote for Mike Huckabee.

2007-08-14T13:36:00.000-04:00

Simply on the grounds that I absolutely refuse to say "President Huckabee" for the next 4-8 years. I mean, COME ON, it's a cross between a Mark Twain Character and a mediocre family resturant chain.

I'm severely depressed right now.

2007-08-08T14:07:00.000-04:00

And I don't want your charity. I think I will post what's going on in my other secret blog. I just need a place to emorant.

Don't expect updates for a while... which probably means I'll end up posting something Friday or something. You know how it works.

Ok. So I'm ready to talk about my Aunt Bobbi now.

2007-07-24T10:14:00.000-04:00

My Great Great Aunt Bobbi passed away over the weekend, specifically, very early Saturday morning. I spent a good majority of the weekend pretending that she was still sitting in Sunrise watching the TV at an abnormally high volume and complaining about the food, but it's time to deal now.

I've grieved a little, but it's hard to grieve for a woman who kept praying to die and questioning why she was still alive. She's out of pain now and that's what's important. How can you grieve for someone's who had thier wish granted?

Her funeral is this coming Friday. She's being buried up in PA next to her late husband Ray.

She was fun to talk to, even if she did mistake me for my mother all the time. I mean if you asked her who Jaime was, she'd say, "Oh, she's Mitzi's daughter." but then she'd look right at me and say, "Mitzi, can you _____."

If you ever corrected her, she'd get snippy. "I know that!"

She still knew who everyone was by name and who they were related to, but she was getting faces and time periods confused. For a while, she thought that her parents, her husband, brother and her niece(my grandmother) and her nephew had all passed away this year. While it is true that they are all no longer with us, some died several decades ago, so she was getting the timelines confused, and was convinced she'd been in the assisted living home for a year, when it's really been 6.

She also missed her 95th birthday by about two weeks.

While she was in Shady Grove, she, my mothr and I talked about going out to Charlestown and watching the races. She looked at me and smiled and said, "I bet you'd play the horses!"

She'll be missed.

So we're an item now.

2007-07-22T20:57:00.000-04:00

Me and my guy friend from the concert. Since he's now going to be a part of my life, i guess I can tell you that his name is Rob. He lives up in Baltimore though, so I'm going to have to hurry up and get my drivers liscence.

I really hate not having a liscence. I really hate the 60 hours behind the wheel shit you have to do.

:)

VACATION TIEMZ!!!!1

2007-07-16T21:21:00.001-04:00

As the title so eloquently put it, I am on vacation this week. The best thing is that I am not going anywhere. No traveling, no scedules, no plans, no nothing. I went to work with Nikki last night and we sat there and slept and played playstation.

She and I ran around yesterday in the creek near her house and picked wild raspberries along Clopper Road. She made a absolutely bomb wild raspberry cheesecake out of them. There are still some left. We also found some fresh and rope mulberries, which aren't as good, but are still edible.

I've been talking to my guy friend that I met last week on the phone. He's a sweetheart. We're actually a lot alike.

We'll see where it goes.

So I am about to leave out of here in a few minutes. I guess I should go pack up the playstation.

So it's been a bomb vacation so far. I have Titan and Qi here at Nikki's, so they are having fun playing with the other cats and with Chewpie.

Summer Slaughter Tour

2007-07-09T10:45:00.001-04:00

I went to the Summer Slaughter Tour at the Sonar with Nikki this weekend. I met a guy up there and we exchanged phone numbers. We've talked acouple of times since, so we'll see how things go.

It feels really nice to know that I will be on vacation next week. I am covering for another admin this week, so I will be busy busy busy!

Um. Tra la la la. It feels nice to be all caught up on my bills this month. I have a bit left over. I'm about to go check my accounts after I post this. I'm always worried about that now. I literally live paycheck to paycheck. My mortgage payment is an entire pay check. Literally. My paycheck is about $70 more than the mortgage.

I wish sometimes I was rich, but then I'd probably just have a prescription drug habit and a pomeranian name Miffy.

Happy 4th again.

2007-07-04T23:23:00.000-04:00

Went to a block party in Nikki's neighborhood where Rick and two other neighbors formed the holy trinity of macho front yard grilling. Nikki and I cooked and had a blast! We didn't go see fireworks because of the rain, but we all took a wonderful nap until 10:45. Rick just dropped me off, because alas, I have to work tomorrow. So man. I'm really not all that tired right now. I think I fell asleep around 6 something. Sheeesh. Food and beverage of the alcoholic kind makes you very sleepy.

Happy 4th, assheads!

2007-07-04T08:15:00.000-04:00

There isn't mcuh going on. Ivona, Nikki and I were at Quiznos yesterday. I tried to pick up my chair and move it closer to the table. Turns out the wooden seat was not well afixed to the metal frame and I ended up smashing my finger pretty badly. There's a bruise under my nail. I'm lucky the nail didn't break. Christ it hurt. I almost started crying, and the ice I was holding to it only made it hurt more.

I also had to cuss out some asshole teenagers yesterday for calling me fat while I walked home. Sometimes I wish it was legal to stab people in the kidney.

So today is the fourth. We're probably going to the parking garage again.

Either way, I am starving. So bye.

The tarantula bit me.

2007-06-29T12:29:00.000-04:00

HA HA. No she didn't, but I bet you rolled your eyes and wondered why it took so long.

She's never even threatened me or flicked her urticating hairs at me.

Sooooo, what's been shaking blogger? Nada yo say? Are you going out to get an iPhone? I'm not.

I'm going to happy hour tonight. We had a major settlement at work and we're celebrating. Fun!

I don't know what else to write. I got a PS2 (FLYING LEAP INTO 2000) for my birthday. I may get some more games and a memory card when I get paid next week...that is after all the bills. At least the mortgage is taken care of for July, so I don't need to lay awake at night and worry about that.

The roaches escaped last night, but I found them all. It was like twisted easter egg hunt. I found Fuckface on the side of my computer monitor, Fabricio on the side of the desk and Maria chilling on a shoe. Bella also molted again. I also found out that they are all MALE. No females. That's why they aren't breeding. I want them to breed so I never have to buy crickets again for Milla. I want them to breed so I can give Nikki some nice yumyums for Frankie.

I haven't gotten around to getting the Deaths Head roaches yet. I think I may also keep a few as pets and let them breed as well. I don't know. Maybe. I already have roaches, but the Deaths Heads are pretty.

So...I ate some ants...

2007-06-25T01:01:00.000-04:00

I left the couscous out on the counter, forgetting that I've been battling an infestation of miniscule ants for the past week.

Without thinking about it or turning on the kitchen light, I took a bite some cous cous and stuck it in the fridge.

Later, I noticed the ants were SWARMING on the countertop. I noticed the odd circlar pattern that they were making but thought nothing of it while I cussed and swore and yelled and smothered them all in pink, berry scented dishsoap. (of which I only partially cleaned up on purpose. It looks like there's no soap anywhere unless it catches the light, then you can see the soap film on the counter. I want to see if it deters them.)

As I was leaving the kitchen, it suddenly dawned on me that duh...the couscous. The circular pattern? Hmm. About the size of a small sauce pan.

So I took it out of the fridge and sure enough, ants were all over it, though since they were cold they weren't moving and/or dead.

So, I concluded my weekend by inadvertantly eating ants.

I tried to convince myself to be grossed out, but I just can't. They're full of protein and um...yeah. People eat them on purpose in parts of the world, so I'm not going to die or anything.

Adventures in Tarantula Care

2007-06-22T11:14:00.000-04:00

I got the crickets in that I ordered for Milla.

Do you have any idea what 500 crickets looks or smells like? I keep them in a terrarium in the basement that I had lying around from when I was a kid. The little fuckers are voracious eaters. I’ve fed them nearly half my supply of specially formulated cricket and roach food that came with the hissers. I think I am going to order more or just feed them cat food. Every day I go down to check on them, there are more and more of them dead. I think they literally trample each other. Oh well.

Milla isn’t even eating the two I put in her tank. She seems to be frightened of them. WTF. I hope she just isn’t hungry; either that or she’s about to molt. If so, I will have to take them out of her tank because crickets can actually injure molting tarantulas.

One of the roaches molted. I knew it had to. You could see it barely fit inside its skin, but it’s been that way for well over a month now. If it wasn’t going to molt, I was going to see if Milla wanted it.

I may order some deaths head roaches and keep them in with the crickets. I’ll keep a few as pets, I guess and just keep the rest as feeders. They have wings, but apparently, they can’t fly, just use them to soften their fall when they...fall. Maybe the crickets are just too small for her. I don’t know. I honestly don’t. I keep waiting to go home and see a cricket carcass in the tank, but no. They are still both there. I think I am going to put a carrot in there for them tonight so they won’t start trying to gnaw on Milla.

Birthdays and Tarantulas.

2007-06-17T22:44:00.000-04:00

Today is my birthday! Mom and I went to breakfast and I went back to her house to hang out with her and help her with some Jewelry stuff. About 4, my father came and got me and took me to his place where I saw my grandmother, who just flew into town this afternoon.

We went over to Merla's and had a nice outdoor meal of hot dogs and hamburgers. They got me a fruit topped birthday cake and I got to chill.

Yesterday Rick and Nikki got me a rose haired tarantula for my birthday! At Nikki's suggestion, I've named her Milla, obviously after my favorite celebrity, Milla Jovovich.

It was rather amusing. I read my card and closed my eyes for my present. When I opened them, my Nikki was holding a plastic lizard/creature tank out to me. I was like YAAAAAY I needed a new tank...secretly I was like...that's it? Because she made a big deal about my present and how much she hoped I'd like it, and a $10.99 critter tank while very appreciated and needed would make for a weird present to make a big deal about.

She rolled her eyes and was like, "There's a paper inside."

Immediatly I was thinking, "Oh god. They got me another animal. o_o"

And I read it.

And it said, "Rose Haired Tarantula."

And of course, you know me. I flipped. I was like, "Dude. No way. You're fucking serious!" and hopped around the room while Rick smiled and handed the Petco cardboard case to me.

He took out the care sheet and started reading it.

"It is not recommended that you handle your tarantula..."

And he looked up and she was crawling on my arm. He rolled his eyes and continued reading and I was spouting out the shit he was trying to read about the hazards of the animal before he could read them himself.

Nikki said, "See? I told you she already knew all that shit."

I honestly thought I'd be a little more creeped out by a giant arachnid capable of inflicting painful bites, but I really am not. I don't like handling her because she's very delicate and fragile. One fall, even from a short distance could kill her.

Ok. Enough yakking. Pictures. There won't be many pictures of me holding her in the future because like I said, she's very fragile...and duh, they can bite if you startle them. You have to keep your movements slow and deliberate. Luckily rose hairs are one of the most docile species and are good for beginners, which face it, I am a beginner.

Pictures are very large. I didn't resize them. All the better to see detail.

Dude... Seriously. I think that box of Potato Shakers has been in the house since 1992...

Paris Hilton...through with 'acting dumb?' Because it's 'no longer cute?'

2007-06-13T14:16:00.000-04:00

It was an act? Is she serious?

Who the fuck ever told her acting dumb was cute? It counterproductive for women as a whole. She and all women who are like or who idolize her do nothing but reinstate the stereotype that women are decorations for the arms of men.

She enrages and makes me absolutely sick. The only reason I ever learned her name was because of that whole stupid 'secret sex video' of hers, and I wish I hadn't. I wish I'd never heard of her and I wish she'd just fade into obscurity like Max Headroom.

Weekend Joy!

2007-06-12T06:55:00.000-04:00

So i took Friday off for Titan's neutering. He's fine, and doens't seem any worse for the wear. I've heard first hand accounts of male cats who've gotten ultra shitty over losing their nuts. Luckily that's not the case.

Nikki, Rick and I had an AWESOME meal at Smith & Wollensky this weekend. I swear that was the best steak I've ever had. Afterwards, we picked up Jessi from Mom & Dan's

Saturday, we rented a van and Nikki, Shelly, Chantel, Britney, Jessi and I all went up to Gambrill state park. When we realized nothing was there, we turned around and drove all the way to Sandy Point State park....180° in the opposite direction. For those of you that don't know, Sandy Point is that nice beachy strip of land on your left when you are about to go over the Bay Bridge (In the direction that you have to pay toll.)

We swam in the bay water. It was nice...but very olive colored and opaque. I got sunburnt.

Afterwards, we went back to Nikki's, watched Doogal, and Jessi Shelly and I went to Borders.

The next day, we all went to the Upper County pool, yelled at life guards and had pool time adventures.

I was really sick Sunday night. Diarreha, vomiting and the whole nine yards. Woke up yesterday still feeling shitty (literally) but I couldn't justify taking another day off. I went into work and drank some gatoraide to try and get back some electrolytes. Then I read on Wikipedia that gatoraide sucks for that...but wtf. Like I have any other electrolyte drinks just sitting around handy.

I was chilled, and really weak, and my muscles were sore. So needless to say, I left early. I finished up a project that I'd agreed to earlier and left. When I got home, the chills were gone, but I was sweating and my skin was cool to the touch.

I stayed up long enough to check all my online shit and eat a thing of cup noodles before crashing at 5:30. I woke up off and on between then and 6:00 this morning when I finally decided to get up.

I feel a lot better now.

Today we're going on a bowling outing at work. I suck at bowling, but apparently, so does everyone else but the intern.

Life progresses

2007-05-30T15:51:00.000-04:00

Titan was supposed to get his little nuts snipped today, but I’ve changed vets. He’s going in next Thursday. I may even have to push it back further than that due to financial constraints. I think it will all work out though. He and Qi are really getting along well now, though he still occasionally pins her down and plays too rough with her. She let’s me know by mewing miserably or hissing.

I took them both to the new vet last Saturday. Titan is now seven and five ounces and Qi is two and five ounces.

The roaches are starting to molt. They’re taking forever though because it’s kinda cool and dry in the house. They really need humidity and warmth to help them molt. Today, I placed them up in the computer room, where I keep the window open because I’m too lazy to close it. I have the vent open in that room too, so it doesn’t get too terribly hot. Maybe a few days in there will benefit them, though I’ve learned from the past that my animals get less attention upstairs than down.

They also need more bedding. All I have is some dried mulch and moss that they could use, besides what the people sent me in the package. I think I will change their bedding today when I get home because it’s getting dirty and they need to stay clean and happy while they are molting, when they are most vulnerable.

Petey is doing just fine too. I took some awesome pictures of him last week, which I still need to upload from the camera. I was going to do it yesterday, but I forgot my camera at work. Stupid!!1

The week isn't bad so far.

2007-05-23T20:26:00.000-04:00

It could be better. It could be worse.

I somehow got hooked to Dexter this past two weeks. I watched all of season 1 On Demand. I loved the finale and will be sure to catch next season as well.

I'm also hooked on The Tudors, in spite of the historical inaccuracies. I can look past that and enjoy it.

I think my favorite fictional villan is Hannibal Lecter. Just thoguht I would share that. I really have nothing to blog about.

Ok. It's time to start looking for another job.

2007-05-21T06:33:00.000-04:00

I want out. I actually cried last night, just dreading going back into work.

I don't want to be stuck there for the rest of my natural life just because my housing depends on the income that I make there.

I've been trying to look for other jobs for some time now. Nothing in my skill range pays. Everyone is just like OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO go back to college.

Right. Like that's going to be my magic fix all. Four years and another $200,000 debt to pay off every month. I'd hang myself within a week. Besides, most of the people I know directly out of college make less than me.

And let s not forget, college requires math. Even fresh out of highschool, I was in remedial algebra my first semester in college. Perhaps being in special education wasn't such a good thing.

Now, 10 years later, I can barely add. Sometimes when I play Bones (Dominos for all the ultra white people) I have to actually count the dots.

I would do horribly in college. I doubt I could pass a 7th grade math test. I alread have enough self esteem issues. I don't need to go back to college to add to them.

MY ROACHES CAME IN! YAAAY!

2007-05-17T09:27:00.000-04:00

They came in the mail yesterday. I was impressed with the packaging. The insects themselves came in a gladware container poked with airholes, stuffed with a dry sponge, (They packed it wet, I'm sure.) food and newspaper for the bugs to hide themselves in.

They're pretty fucking awesome. I don't think they even look like roaches. To me, they're just big cool bugs.

I got one to hiss at me last night. Didn't want to be bothered apparently. i thought that I would jump the first time, but I just laughed and touched the hisser again.

I've named the palest male Fabricio for Nikki, who has had a long running joke with our online friends about having a roach by that name.

Here are some pictures! They're all of the same hisser through. I think it's a female.

Madagascan hissing Cockroach.
Lookit my sexy bottom!
I look like straight up doo doo nastiness in this picture.
Wee!

Also, I took some pictures of Qi and Titan sitting with each other last night, but the photo program was being an asshead, so I haven't uploaded them yet.

Qi's vet appoinment is on Saturday. I'm watching Sierra, mom and Dan's dog Friday and Saturday too because they have a show up in Fairhill, PA.

Can you believe that they're doing all 12 weekends of the PA Renn Fest? I'll have Sierra all those weekends too.

GETTYSBURG AND KITTENS!

2007-05-14T09:36:00.000-04:00

That's my new Kitten, Qi. (Pronounced Chi)

So not only that, but a lot of things happened this weekend.

We drove 2 1/2 hour to go to a "metal fest' in Reinholds, PA.

We get up there to discover that it's literally a podunk town divided by train tracks. It turns out to be some small time thing with about 50 people total, most of them 15-18. Best of all, it was in the cafeteria of their local Lions club building, which was very obviously an old school.

There was this one dude there that straight up looked like someone who would totally scream "WE HATES NIAGGERS" complete with his boney 101 lbs. ass, country bumpkin hat, missing teeth and his country bumpkin girlfriend in khaki booty shorts.

They tried to mosh. It was absolutely pathetic. It's hard to mosh in a large gymnasium/cafeteria with only 15 people there.

So we stayed for about 20 minutes and rolled out during a Thunderstorm, and drove to Gettysburg. We spent the night there at the Holiday Inn and went on two ghost walk tours.

On one of them, this older married couple got snappy with us for talking during a VERY unimportant part of the question and answer session. (there were these two guys there in their 20's that were, like, 21 questions. They asked questions about the props "OMG. IS THAT PEACH PRESERVES? ARE THEY LIKE, AUTHENTIC FROM THE HOUSE? CAN I HAVE SOME? HURR HURR") So my friend, who isn't one to take shit from anyone said something back to them. The couple whined to the tourguide. They actually WHINED to the tourguide, who did nothing more than ask us to not talk during hte presentation. Later the guy got in my friend's face and she threatened to shank him.

It was rather amusing, but I was worried about getting kicked off the tour just a little.

So...I bought some roaches. ALSO. PA METAL FEST.

2007-05-11T12:09:00.000-04:00

You can get the most amazing things on the internet. Namely, giant hissing cockroaches that come with a complete care kit.

Yeah. That's about lifesize.

I've been thinking about it for well over a year now. I've decided to go for it.

Nikki, Ivona and I are going to Pennsylvania tomorrow for a Metal Fest.

11 hours of metal.

That guy from the other concert never called me. I'm not paticullarly surprised or hurt.

YAAAAAY ROACHES!

Today...is a day for magic beans.

2007-05-09T09:46:00.000-04:00

I am so dirt poor until I get my paycheck on Friday. I have just enough to survive until then. Just enough for the train and a brand new bus ticket.

I need to get my liscence so I can get my passport. It's really shitty that they won't let you use a state issued learners permit as an ID. This makes me grumpy. I want to travel the wooooooooorld. How can I do that without a passport? :angryface:

I'm totally chilling right now at work. About to start back up on my ongoing project. It's a little boring. Oh well.

Nikki lent me her new Arch Enemy CD. I copied it to my computer last night and then to my MP3 player. A lot of the music on my player is from albums my friends own that I ripped to the computer. Jason and I would sit in my room while I went through his CD case and just picked and chose what I wanted. That's how I got all but one of my Radiohead albums.

It's nice to have a variety. OH. That reminds me. I have a Bleeding Through CD here that I keep meaning to take home. I just shoved it into my purse.

After literally, over 9 months of forgetting. I'm finally going to copy it to my computer.

So yeah. I am still dirt poor. Can I borrow a dollar?

This weekend.

2007-05-08T13:43:00.000-04:00

Today is my Monday. I woke up yesterday, after Sunday's Type O Negative concert feeliing nasty. I called out. I had really bad diarreah, and there was no way I was risking an hour long commute with no toilet access. Fun stuff, huh?

So now that you know all about my bowels, Nikki and I went to go see Type O on Sunday. I met a guy there. He was cute and a good kisser. I gave him my number.
Life trucks forward.

Getting paid this Friday. So many things I want to do.

Nikki cleaned my living room. I wish I could say I helped, but as per usual, I suck so horribly at cleaning that she did most of the work. I am very appreciative to her. I am going to go after work and buy her a CD with the rest of my giftcard from work as a thank you.

So I've been to three concerts in the span of a week. Beat that.

Sunday: Dimmu and Devildriver
Monday: Behemoth
Sunday: Type O Negative and Celtic Frost

I welcome my favorite hobby with open arms. I honestly can say that.

Nikki, Ivona and I also went mall hopping on Saturday. I got a Dethklok shirt and a cute little outfit at Wal*Fart for under 15 bucks.

Spending money I really can't afford to spend right now. It made me a little apprehensive, but I have just enough to get through the week.

Dude. I wish i knew Hindi

2007-05-04T12:21:00.000-04:00

I want to blog in Hindi!

Oh well. I'm finally in the mood for a full length blog of sorts.

So, I got my physical exam done finally. Turns out, I have normal cholestorol (185) and it's not a concern. My triglycerides are extremely high though, so now I am on a low fat low sugar diet and taking Fish Oil caplets.

So as for 'feeling' my veins clog up, it's not happening. :)

I'm pretty much sticking to it because I am dirt poor this week, but screw that if I am going to cut that shit out of my diet completely. I'll cut back, but not cut out. I eat a lot of oatmeal now. Lots of oatmeal. It's cheap, and it's healthy. It also gives me gas.

Chewpie is getting his snipskies today. Titan will be going in at the end of this month, in fact, I should schedule that when I am done with this.

Can you believe that brat is already almost 6 months old?

I'm also getting another cat. Shelly's Regina had babies.

If I get a male, I'll name it Spartacus. I like that name. People are too stupid to know one is Roman and the other is Greek, and will just think I have a theme going. I don't know about female.

I also discovered that Petey likes sweets. What a brat. he won't eat the cucumbers and squash and greens that I provide him. No. He only eats fruits. He devoured an apple and a piece of banan that I put in there for him.

Oh well. As long as he is eating. I keep him down in the kitchen now. It makes it easier to feed him.

Still here.

2007-04-26T12:18:00.000-04:00

Dimmu Borgir concert on Sunday. Coworker friend is moving up to New York.

Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right. Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

Still not in the mood for detailed updates.

I now have a scanner/printer and a digital camera.

2007-04-17T07:19:00.000-04:00

I've had my computer for over two years and never had a printer.

I got a really nice camera. I like it.

Nothing.

2007-04-09T14:09:00.000-04:00

Nothing of note has happened. Just the normal shit i would blog about, but I haven't sprouted tentacles or anything.

I just haven't felt like writing anything here.

Well, I'm no longer dying.

2007-03-23T10:29:00.000-04:00

I took last Friday off work. I was just too damned sick to go in.

I'm still a little congested, but it's to the point now that every time I blow my nose, a strangely satisfying amount of head gunk comes out and I feel as if I am accomplishing something.

My cousin's wedding is tomorrow. I got my nails done last night and I'm getting my eyebrows waxed this afternoon. I may as well attempt to look presentable.

Got a cold.

2007-03-15T11:57:00.001-04:00

I also got a Zune.

My last MP3 player died back in october. Piece of shit. Creative also has horrible customer service, as they only offer support by Email.

Just crapped out and died for no reason, so I got a Zune. I don't like how iTunes is laid out, so i don't want to get an iPod.

But yeah, I have a cold right now.

BLOGTACULAR!

2007-03-05T15:29:00.000-05:00

So we've got a lot of shows to go to this Spring. We've already got our Devildriver/Dimmu Borgir tickets. We missed Killswitch this weekend, which sucked, but they will be back around again. I've seen them at Ozzfest a few times, so I'm not too broken up about it.

Type O Negative is coming in May.

I always have to pick expensive hobbies. My art collecting hobby is expensive too. I got one of my prints professionally framed recently. With the 50% off discount and my gift card, it still came out to $70. And that's only one. I have at least 15 more pieces.

Why do I always go for the expensive shit? Why couldn't I just keep collecting bottles? That's nice and cheap. I still have the huge bottle i found in someone's recycling stuff when my ex and I were walking back to my father's house from his apartment years ago. I use it to hold coins now, which is pointless since the mouth is too small for quarters.

I've also had Titan for a month. His next vet appointment is this Saturday, as is Nikki's St. Patrick's day party. At least I think it's this weekend.

Oh well. I bought some CDs on eBay this weekend. It drives me nuts that it's so hard to find god black metal bands at stores around here. Borders has Dimmu, but none of the others that I have become fascinated with.

I heard Carpathian Forest YEARS ago while my friends and I were sitting around listening to the metal station on digital cable. I was entranced by it, and that name has stuck in my head ever since. That was about...2004? And I looked! I DID. i looked for them at stores. FYE in the mall even has a metal section. A whole, metal section, and I still couldn't find any!

So I got two of thier albums and two Vesperian Sorrow albums.

I was also riding around with my father this weekend, and he has Satallite Radio in his car, so I found the metal station and we listened to that. I heard some Unearth, which are also playing with Devildriver and Dimmu at the upcoming show. It was pretty cool. I also heard a band called San Sha. I did a quick search online for them and didn't find anything after checking Wikipedia and Myspace. I'll try google next. I liked their sound a lot.

I...I think I need help.

2007-02-26T15:22:00.000-05:00

I get too angry. Far. Too. Angry.

I've mentioned before that it manifests itself physically.

On the outside, I'm calm. I may even seem cheerful to those whom have nothing to do with why I am upset. Why should I burden or snap at them? They have done nothing. But inside, I'm churning, spiraling. Adrenalin is pumping. Slight nausea. I shake, I literally see red and I want to run run run or fight fight fight.

It's a flight or fight response. I've read that when we get upset or feel that we are in what's called 'social danger', (being laughed at, mocked, yelled at, getting in trouble at work or school, etc.) our bodies can't decern it from physical life threatening dangers and produce the same chemical concoction that helped save our prehistoric ancestors from harm, and that has helped numerous people do amazing things like lift trucks off of loved ones or fight off people many times thier size.

What I can't figure out is why it happens when I am angry. This is my next step to understanding myself, I think. I think I might need help figuring it out, though.

I can understand if I'm scared. Like if I had to do something I am afraid of like jumpp in a lake or was beign forced to walk around naked or something silly (for other people, it would be things like perhaps speaking or singing infront of a large group.)

But anger is not physical danger. It's not social danger. It's not ANY kind of danger to me. Anger is a natural emotion, albeit one of our not so pleasant ones. So why do I have this reaction when I become very angry? Especially when the subject of the anger has nothing to do with me and is of no consequence to me?

What and why. That's what I would like to know. Maybe understanding the reaction will help me control it myself.

Big ice and snow storm, and general blog like rambling.

2007-02-16T10:17:00.000-05:00

We had a big ice and snow storm hit this week. I tried to go to the doctor's and work on Wednesday.

Well, I stood at that bus stop forever, and it became clear that the bus wasn't coming. Without it I could get to neither work or the doctor, so I canceled my appointment and called out of work.

Around noon, I went over to Tomm's. We sat in his basement and played Dead Rising.

Then we went out to lunch (for whatever reason) with Nikki and Rick. It was rather adventurous in her little Scion, which was fishtailing slightly in the road slush as she drove with the bottom scraping the ice.

"Weeeee!"

But we all made it to the restaurant and back safely. Tomm and I spent the rest of the day playing Dead Rising again. I played it for a little bit until I got a headache. It's a lot of fun, but I sucked at it.

So Titan's first vet appointment is tomorrow. I have to walk my happy ass up to the vet with all the ice and shit on the ground. I think walking down Mallory and through that front neighborhood will be my safest bet, as I can see more traffic from there. We'll be alright. I was not expecting remanants of an ice storm to be around when I made his appointment, though.

I still haven't bought my tickets for the Killswitch show. I will have to do that this weekend some time. Probably get them online or something and have it as 'will call' at the door. They charge arms and legs and first borns for shipping, when all they do is stick it in an envelope with normal postage.

Now that the sun is on the rise again, I feel my winter depression subsiding. It's about time too. I usually last until the end of Jan or early Feb by keeping myself cheerful and not letting it bother me.

Treating yourself for clinical depression is tricky, but it can be done. You just have to resign yourself to the fact that there will be tears, there will be hopelessness and there will be physical symptoms along the road. I always thought I was over reacting when my chest hurt when I was depressed. Turns out there are provable physical pains that depression can cause.

Many people tell me to seek professional help. Why? So I can take pills? Happy Pills aren't the magic cure to everything, you asshats. They're over prescribed to people (like me) who ARE CAPABLE of doing something about thier situation to make the change themselves. I don't want to take them.

Last time I took an Anti-Depressant, I took Welbutrin, which was a fucking nightmare because it's an MAOI. About 95% of over the counter medications for cold symptoms and allergies are not compatable with MAOI's, so when I got a sinus infection, I had to suffer without any OTC relief because the only things I could take were some crazy herbal remady shit that didn't do anything.

One of the reasons he prescribed it was to help me quit smoking as well as treat my depression. Since I don't have an addiction to cigarettes because of the infrequency that I smoke, it did nothing for me in that regard. I eventually quit taking it on my own after a few months.

Excitement abounds! I have a new kitten!

2007-02-06T09:06:00.000-05:00

last night, Nikki and I went to the petstore over by Circuit City and ShadowLand. There were two kittens for sale and I bought one.

His name is Titan. I'm calling up the vet office in a few minutes to schedule his first appointments.

He's into EVERYTHING, and he keeps trying to chew on the cord for my drawing tablet.

Nikki's Birthday.

2007-01-24T09:13:00.000-05:00

Nikki's birthday was on Saturday.

We roll with style.

We rolled up to Dave and Busters in an Excursion Limo. We laughed, took pictures and had champaign in the back.

And no one had to know that I got my entire outfit at Wal*Fart, even though I told everyone who complimented me.

I was about to get into the shower at Nikki's when she announced that she was going shopping. Not wanting to look like a scrub in a limo, I quickly threw back on my clothes and went her two nieces, Channy and Brittney and my sister Jessi. We ran around Wal*Fart like lunatics. I got shoes, trouser socks, a shirt and a skirt and some panties for good measure. We bought everything and hightailed it back to Nikki's. We had 20 mintues to get ready

Getting ready was a blur. I hopped in the shower, washed what was important and ran around the room, ripping the tags off my new clothes and putting them on.

Then I hurtled downstairs and dove into Nikki's make up. Now I'm a liquid eyeliner girl. I like the thick solid lines it makes. Nikki is a pencil girl. We both rock our styles, so I went to work on my eyes. I wore mascara, eyeliner and lipcolor. That was it, which if anyone knows me, wearign any make up is dressed up for me.

Nikki later hinted in the evening that we would also be getting a limo for my birthday.

Once the night was over, and we got back to her house, she hugged me and her nieces and said it was the best birthday she'd ever had.

That's good enough for me.

Why make a 17 year old kid decide right then and there what they want to do with their life?

2007-01-22T11:28:00.000-05:00

How assinine. All anyone ever did in high school was make me feel horrible becuase I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. I used to sit around and cry about it because I couldn't decide what I wanted to do or what my college goals were.

Well excuse the fuck out of me. I had enough shit to work through without trying to plan out the next 40 years of my career path. On one side of the spectrum, I had all the fucking popular assholes threatening me and spreading rumors that I was a devil worshipper and that I'd killed my neighbor's dog.

Now, 10 years later I still don't know what the fuck to do with my life.

We got an email from our boss today. He was very apologetic but turns out a lot of people didn't really do much with this weird ass new peer review development plan at work. He apologized because he thought they were optional, but turns out they are manditory. he's already revised his own about 4 times. Everyone in the department hates this new review. It isn't even company wide, it's just some bullshit our department decided to do. It's administered by an outside company.

I looked mine over for his sake, because I actually respect my boss. Coupling the fact that I didn't really understand how to write it up in the first place, I don't know what else I can do to develop a plan to increase my strength of 'listening to others' or 'treating others with respect.' What the hell am I supposed to say? How the hell do you improve those and set a target dates for them? Isn't that just common sense and courtesy? It's completely ongoing. There's no target dates for shit like that. Maybe I'll start giving people fruitbaskets. Fruit baskets are respectable. Or maybe I should start repeating everything everyone says to me like a parrot, so they will know for sure that I am listening intently and gripping onto every single word they say.

I spent the first two weeks in December stressing out over it, and I refuse to give it anymore of my emotion. I had sleepless nights. I'm 27. I'm too young for this shit. Let the 54 year old executives who make millions of dollars a year lay awake at night.

I've said before I'm not a corporate drone. Only losers live to work, and they die miserable and alone at 45 with thousands of stomach ulcers.

Want to know my goal? My goal is to go to work, get my job done, feel accomplished, then go home or out with friends or whatever my plans in the evenings are. I'm not a god dammned day planner. I take life as it comes at me. Half the concerts my friends and I go to are last minute decisions and we buy tickets at the door. We rarely make weekend plans unless somethign special is coming up.

So excuse me.

The fucking Spam Whores are back!

2007-01-19T07:02:00.000-05:00

So sorry folks, I had to switch comments back to "Registered Users Only."

Someone actually had the audacity to go through and manually spam me. All for a fucking Dell Computer none the less. And I was going to actually go buy a new Dell in the next few months.

WELL FUCK THAT NOW.

Well, I don't know, but I hope the spammer walks in front of a bus.

The weekend.

2007-01-16T11:22:00.001-05:00

It was alright. I got pissed at some little twat girl on Gaia who spammed up the guild with chatspeak about raping animals. Then when I said it was the stupidest thread I'd ever seen, she said some senseless shit about me living the american dream.

Honestly. Where the fuck is she in life? She plays trumpet in her high school marching band. High school marching band. WOW. SO FUCKING AWESOME. YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN ME, THAT IT'S BLINDING.

Either way, I ended up losing my temper and putting my fist through my bedroom wall. One more hole to patch, I suppose.

I've decided to buy a Playstation 2 all asshole late. I've been playing a lot of Guitar Hero and I want to buy the game.

I'm also getting a laptop when I get my bonus so I can play World of Warcraft. It looks like fun. I was just going to get it now and finance it. I might still do that and then just pay it off quickly instead of dragging the payments over two years at $50 a month, just so I can have it quicker.

I need to call them though. I don't understand computers enough to know what I need. This is how the conversation will most likely go.

"(Insert generic scripted Dell Corporation greeting here with sales of the day), This is _____. How can I help you?"
"Yes, hi. I want to buy a Laptop. I want to play World of Warcraft on it, so it's gotta be spiffy."

DORKDORKDORK.

Annoying Metro Announcements

2007-01-12T09:18:00.000-05:00

"See it. Say it.

The Metro transit police, would like to remind you that if you see something out of the ordinary on...metro bus or metro rail, that you SAY (dramatic pause) something to a metro employee or contact the metro transit police at 202-962-2121."

I really hate that announcement. To the woman who recorded it: Honey, it's a Metro announcement. You're not up for an Oscar. Make it more informational, and less William Shatner.

Everyone complained about the new "Step back, doors closing!" recordings on the train. That isn't nearly as irritating.

To thier credit though, I do have the Metro Police number memorized now.

LAWL. Update.

2007-01-11T15:02:00.000-05:00

My millipede is a male. I actually found that out only a day or two after I got him.

Smooches is no longer allowed to sleep in the room with me. Last night she decided to gnaw on my toe and then decided to try and climb my dresser to harrass the millipede. the night before she was looking out the window and when she jumped down, she landed square on my face with a paw in my eye. I tossed her down towards my feet. I couldn't even help it. It was a reflexive reaction. She purred and snuggled my feet. Other than that, she's still the sweetest cat.

I'm effectually living alone. I've seen my mother twice in the past two and a half weeks. I haven't seen Dan or Jessi since Christmas.

Cat sitting.

2007-01-04T08:52:00.000-05:00

I'm cat sitting a wonderful little feline named Smooches for the next two weeks.

She's very affectionate and well behaved. Her owner dropped her off last night and within an hour, the cat was laying on top of me purring while I was laid out on the couch watching Mr. and Mrs. Smith.

HAPPY NEW YEAR.

2007-01-01T19:14:00.000-05:00

Crazy shit. 2007. Someone bring me a martini.

New Phone and Blogger rant

2006-12-28T21:49:00.000-05:00

Blogger has been giving me so much touble lately! I can barely sign in. I have to open all the pages in new Windows just to get them to work. I don't know what the blogger folks did, but it's really irritating. YA HEARD ME, BLOGGER?

Anyhoosit, I got a new phone. It's one of those satanic spazzophones that folds out into a keyboard.

Ooooo. Shiny. It's got a 2.0 Mega Pixel camera built into it.

I have to go shopping tomorrow for Ashley and Kyle. We're seeing them on Saturday since we didn't get to see them on Christmas.

Much excitement!

2006-12-26T21:54:00.000-05:00

Happy Holidays everyone! Sorry I haven't had time to write, but I've been kicking around, and honestly haven't thought much about updating my blog.

Mom and Dan are pretty much not here anymore, though almost all of thier stuff is still here. The dog isn't here either, so I am effectually living alone. I don't know. I sort of miss the dog, but I really can't take care of her since I go out on the weekends and shit. Plus she shed constantly and made the house a mess.

You won't believe what I bought!

I GOT A GIANT MILLIPEDE.

Here's a few pictures of her.

I don't even know if it's female, but Nikki came up with the name
Penelope, and it seems to be sticking. I thought of Pete, but that didn't stick. She's really docile...I mean it's a millipede. They really don't do much but eat, shit and sleep.
Anyway, Christmas was nice. I got lots of adult gifts, like stemware, plates, cookware and some giftcards to Lowes.

I'm also adopting a Finch from Merla, dad's girlfriend. It's a funny story of how the bird came into her life. It was caught at her work flying around the building. People were going to let it
go when they realized it wasn't an outdoor finch. So she offered to keep it. But now she's looking for a place for the finch and her four parakeets. I just want the finch, and I'm going to get another one to keep it company. It's male so I'm getting another male. I don't want a 'finch factory' as my cousin humorously put it.

Oh and speaking of my cousin, she's getting married in March. Oy vey. Very short engagement. It seems like everyone I know is running down the aisles and shoving rings on their hands the older I get. I suppose it's winding down to actual adult hood for some of us.

Now that I am done venting:

2006-12-11T10:57:00.000-05:00

This is Audrey Hepburn. I've seen half of Breakfast at Tiffany's which is only one of her films, where she played Holly Golightly, a trendy New Yorker who owned a cat without a name. Why does she intrigue me? Why do I google images of her?

I really don't know. She died Jan 20, 1993, on my best friend's 13th birthday. I don't know why I found that noteworthy, either.

Work isn't worth this.

2006-12-11T10:38:00.000-05:00

Work should not leave me awake at night. No fucking job is worth that.

Work ------------------------------------------------------------- Home

Opposite ends of the map.

I work because I have to. I work to survive. If I didn't have to, I wouldn't. I'm not a corporate mold. I don't fit. I know this. It drives me nuts that I can't get cool tattoos or facial piercings because I need a job more than I need to satisfy my urge to stand out.

If I knew how to make money without being here, I wouldn't be here. I fully admit that I am not a leader or manager. I don't have to be. As the saying goes, "Too many chiefs, not enough indians" or even "Too many cooks in the kitchen spoil the sauce." or something similar. I lose my temper far too easily, I'm impatient and lack the linguistic coordination to train people on how to do things.

On a similar but different end of the spectrum, if I see you doing it wrong, instead of teaching you how to do it, I would rather shove you aside and do it myself. ADHD Gemini's are not the most patient and understanding people.

I'm not Susie Q. McStupidTart, who wears a size two and has a vacant smile. Men don't fawn over me, nor do I want them to. Go bother someone else. I'm trying to enjoy myself over here, and you aren't child production material.

I am a homeowner.

2006-12-02T11:07:00.000-05:00

I own my own house.

Suggestion to the masses: Do not download Internet Explorer 7. I'm happy with Internet Explorer 6, thanks.

Also, I am starving. i haven't had breakfast yet. Going to see Kyle and Ashley today withthe family. I have a feelingthat this weekend is goingto be pretty lax. Nikki has to work tomorrow, but she and I are going to get up and go for a walk.

I'M GOING TO BE A HOME OWNER.

2006-11-29T16:48:00.001-05:00

That's right, as of tomorrow, I will be a co owner of the house that I grew up in.

Buying out my father's half of the house and co owning with my mother. She's moving out soon and I will have it all to myself. I'll be paying the mortgage and utilities and hopefully, I will find a roommate soon. I will need one before long. I can swing a month or two without one, but that's about it.

I think the mortgage will be around $1200 a month. I think I can swing that. I'm getting rid of the cable TV and the land line for the phone. I never watch TV. I watch DVDs.

So yes. This is a whole big, scary enterprise. There's no backing out at this point.

Romantic Interest? Nah.

2006-11-28T12:28:00.001-05:00

Yup. That’s right. Romantic interest = Unsuccessful.

It’s alright. Jaime is better off on her own for now anyway.
This weekend was fun. Nikki had her Thanksgiving party. That was pretty slamming. I brought a ham instead of making my infamous pasta salad. I’m sick of making it. I wish I could make something else. I will have to dig up some recipes and see if I can figure something else out though. I mentioned my grandmother’s coleslaw to Nikki when we were eating Popeyes. She said their coleslaw sucked and I said, “Good coleslaw died with my grandmother.” She asked if I had the recipe. I told her that my mother had it, but she never seemed to get it right, like nana used to make.

Nikki just smiled.

“Maybe she’s not supposed to get it right. Maybe it’s supposed to be passed on to you.”

She may have something. I’ll have mom dig it up and see if I can make it.

Peachy Keen

2006-11-20T11:27:00.000-05:00

Or something like it.

This weekend turned out to be rather amusing. Friday night Nikki, Tomm, his girfriend Nadia and I went to Jaxx to see Catatonia and Moonspell. On the way back, we hit gridlocked traffic. It was stopped on both sides of the road.

Tomm immediaatly went into a far fetched explanation, which amused me thoroughly. He said it was armageddon and a zombie attack when people started getting out of their car to try and see what was going on down the road.

Finally Nikki yelled, "IT'S NOT FUCKING ZOMBIES!" She was already annoyed with the guy next to her who was blaring gospel music with his window open. She shut her window, but that only SORT OF helped since Tomm's window was open because he was smoking a cigarette.

I too chided him and said it was not zombies, but I actually found the whole situation to be amusing.

Saturday I bummed around the house in the morning. Later Nikki and Dave picked me up. She asked me if I could watch Chewpie while she was at work and I agreed. He was a perfect angel at the beginning of the night, until he ate some cat shit. After that he was a little monster.

Sunday was pretty chill. Woke up around noon and we all went out for Chipotle. Around Nikki left for work and I stayed behind with Rick and played some GTA:SA (THE URBAN STREAKER STRIKES AGAIN.)

I went shopping with Rick and Dave at Sam's Club and chilled at the bar until I went home around 11.

Fields of Athenry

2006-11-20T11:18:00.000-05:00

By a lonely prison wall, I heard a young girl calling
"Michael, they have taken you away,
For you stole Trevelyan's corn,
So the young might see the morn.
Now a prison ship lies waiting in the bay."

Chorus:
Low lie the fields of Athenry
Where once we watched the small free birds fly
Our love was on the wing
We had dreams and songs to sing
It's so lonely round the fields of Athenry.

By a lonely prison wall, I heard a young man calling
"Nothing matters, Mary, when you're free
Against the famine and the crown,
I rebelled, they cut me down.
Now you must raise our child with dignity."

Chorus

By a lonely harbor wall, she watched the last star fall
As the prison ship sailed out against the sky
For she lived to hope and pray for her love in Botany Bay
It's so lonely round the fields of Athenry.

Chorus

Sorry I haven't written, little Blog.

2006-11-16T11:08:00.000-05:00

It's not that I'm ignoring you, Blog, it's just that I've had nothing to write about.

My mp3 player is broken. It's been broken for a few weeks. It's completely unplayable. I've been in email contact with tech support, and nothing they are offering is helping. I will have to check my email later. I asked if there was just some place where I could send it and get them to look at it, because in all honesty, I have no patience for technology.

Unlike you, little blog. Very unlike you. I do adore you.

I've decided on a whim that next year at the Renn fest, I am going to buy those dagger earrings from the knife maker. I really do like them and the past week or so, I've been thinking heavily about them.

It's also time to upgrade my phone and my service plan soon.

Poor little phone! I can't wait to get a new phone, but will miss this one. It's so resiliant! it's taken liquid damage three times and each time, it came back to life and still works normally. The only lasting damage I have seen to it from these trials are the fact that it drops calls in the metro tunnel now like no one's business. It used to be a champ in the tunnel. It's no worry though, I still get my calls through most of the time.

Hmm. New Possibilities.

2006-11-09T11:47:00.000-05:00

I have a new romantic interest in my life.

Halloween and the weekend.

2006-11-07T10:30:00.000-05:00

Halloween turned out great. Nikki, Dave, Rick and I decorated Nikki and Rick's place. It was ultra spooky on the outside, and had those spiderwebs, graves in the front yard and a fog machine.

Oh yes, a fog machine.

On Halloween night, Nikki, Rick, James, Heather, Jessi, Dave and I all dressed up. My costume was lame. I just wore ripped panty hose, steeltoe boots, a short sleeved, high collar black shirt that shows off the shape of my boobs and somehow cleverly hides my stomach and smokey black eye makeup.

I didn't feel like dressing up in the pirate wench garb for the third year in a row. Jessi wore her renn fest dress and a long black wig. She ended up looking like a Salem witch trial victim. Nikki looked pretty slamming too in her long black wig and gown.

Rick was the freakiest. Nikki got his costume at Wal*FART. It looked lame on the hanger and on the guy in the picture, but once Rick had it on with his Renn Fest leather bracers and his big old costume war hammer, he looked ultra slamming spooky.

Ok. So you get the picture. Everyone but me was spooky.

Rick and Nikki's neighbors decked out their house too and it was a joint effort betweeen the two scaring the hell out of rambunctious teenagers. A couple of smaller children cried, so everyone had to take off their masks or wigs and comfort the small ones and give them extra candy.

We saw one kid dressed up as a skeleton. He must have been no older than four, but he wasn't scared of a single person. He laughed and high fived people who tried to scare him.

So Halloween was a success. Jessi however scared one teenager so badly that he hit her in the back with his candy bag. A cheap shot from a cheap punk. Nikki hunted him down. When she came back, she told Jessi that it was, "VERY well taken care of."

Sooooo...on to this weekend.

WE PLAYED FUCKING GAUNTLET DARK LEGACY ALL WEEKEND BITCHES! And when I say all weekend, I mean...all...weekend.

I had a yellow (COUGH BLACK) Dwarf named Willis. Oh yes. Willis rocks all of you bitches. We tore ass through all the levels. Fun for all. Oh lawdy, fun for all.

This weekend...OMG WTF IS UP WITH THE LINCOLNS?

2006-10-30T09:54:00.000-05:00

So Nikki, Rick, Dave, Shelly and I chilled all weekend. Shelly and Nikki have an inside joke going on with Lincoln Towncars that they won't tell anyone about. So just to piss Shelly off, I followed her around Target reciting made up Lincoln Towncar specs while we were out shopping for Halloween supplies on Sunday.

"All leather interior, with dual side impact airbags, and standard Onstar navigation. V8 Engine with 30,000 mile warrenty..."

The more I said, the faster Shelly walked. Tee hee.

Saturday night, we went out to Zodiac, but Nikki has been so tired lately, so we didn't stay long. I wasn't bothered by that. My Long Island sucked balls.

I saw one of my old college friends, Aris on Friday night at Olney Tavern while we were there to wait for our friend, Jill. There was a halloween party and there was some guy there dressed up like a giant penis. LOL.

Metro Red Line Changes...Too little! Not good enough!

2006-10-27T09:07:00.000-04:00

I saw an advert in the metro today. They were no longer turning trains back at Grovenor-Strathmore! All trains would be going up and down the whole line! CELEBRATION!

Until I read further. It's only effective 9:30AM - 3PM. In other words, BITE US REDLINE RUSH HOUR PASSANGERS! We only cater to little old ladies on afternoon shopping excursions to Friendship Heights and homemakers/work-at-home parents taking their kids to the zoo! Nah-Nah!

In my expirience of riding the metro downtown nearly every weekday since late 2003, unless there is a delay on the line, all Shady Grove trains are packed, while Grovenor trains have seats to spare.

What kills me is that the Shady Grove trains are typically packed to bursting capacity with people getting off at Dupont Circle, and Grovenor.

WHAT? Can't you all stay off the Shady Grove Train? Go ride a Grovenor train. That's what they are there for! To provide extra service to passangers who aren't traveling all the way to the end of the line! I wish there was a way to enforce that.

All passangers getting off at before or at Grovenor-Strathmore MUST ride the provided Grovenor-Strathmore trains. These passangers may not crowd the Shady Grove trains.

How sweet that would be! No more condecending remarks from train operaters stating, "There is a train directly behind this one." Sure. There's a train back there alright. IT'S GOING TO GROVENOR AND THE NEXT SHADY GROVE TRAIN IS 10 MINUTES DOWN THE LINE. It's either THIS Shady Grove train or I miss my bus by 2 minutes and stand outside in the blistering heat or the artic cold.

I actually heard a guy make a snide remark once "Gosh. There's a train behind this one. You think people could wait."

I snapped back with, "Yes, and it's going to Grovenor, which is completely useless to the people crowding onto this train."

Some woman nodded her head in approval. The guy looked elsewhere sheepishly.

I'm still alive.

2006-10-25T09:15:00.000-04:00

Yeah. Had a weekend. Had fun over that weekend. Drama with the family.

I'm still alive, I'm just not in the mood to write.

LOOK WHAT I FOUND

2006-10-18T11:14:00.000-04:00

It's an Eastern Hercules beetle. I found it yesterday morning at the bus stop. It's still there. Lazy little bastard. Just look at the horns! He's cute as a button.

WEEKEND, BITCHES

2006-10-16T15:32:00.000-04:00

This weekend was an absolute BLAST. Nikki got me on Friday night. I don’t really remember much of Friday night. Isn’t that odd? I remember being tired as hell. I bunked with Chantel, Nikki’s niece, who warned me not to roll over on her in the middle of the night unless I wanted a n elbow in the stomach.

Saturday was interesting. We ended up going all over the place. I jumped out of Nikki’s car at the gas station when she was looking for her card, and stuck my card in the pump, then had a small, friendly hand slapping fight with her while I was entering my pin number.

Breakfast that morning was odd. Around 10:45, I asked for a bowl of cereal. Once I had my cereal and was walking into the living room with the spoon on the way to my mouth, Nikki shouted, “SUSHI TIME.”

I was like, “GOD DAMMIT.” I had sushi anyway, along with cereal. O.o

We had an adventure at Ikea, where Rick got his new office computer desk. That was only half the adventure. The other half resided in getting it back to the house and putting it together. I suck at putting shit from Ikea together since they don’t include written instructions, so I just ended up standing there and watching.

We also watched Underworld Evolution. I kept nodding off during it, which was obnoxious, because a lot of it was in Russian with subtitles.

So either way, Sunday we went to the Renaissance Festival. On the way there, Dave, Rick and Nikki performed a feat I will probably never see again, and won’t soon forget. Everyone was laughing and having a grand old time. Tomm, Dave, Andrea, Rick, Chantel, Nikki, Britney and I all went in a large group. Tomm and Rick bought arm bracers. I loaned Tomm a bit of money so he could get the cooler pair.

On the way back, the two cars raced about on the highway, passing each other, while Tomm and Chantel exchanged insults on their Nextels.

We somehow managed to beat them back to the house. Nikki, Tomm and I talked for a little bit before he went home. Nikki and i were contemplating going to see Deicide, but didn’t end up making it, so she dropped me off at home when she went to go get Chewpie from her mother’s house.

OOGEY BOOGEY

2006-10-13T13:03:00.000-04:00

I know it’s been a while since my last update. Everything has been fine. Chewpie is growing. Frankie is getting to be a cow beast. (He’s now bigger than your hand. His tail alone is about twice as long as he was head to tail when Nikki got him.)

I went to bed at 8 last night. I’d taken some Nyquil and some Sudafed for my stupid congestion. It was all stuck at my inner ear and the pressure was really hurting. I then went into the living room and watched Project Runway on DVR since I wasn’t able to catch it Wednesday night. Dan served dinner about half way through, and by the time I was done, I was nodding off.

So I crashed only two hours after I got home last night.

The upside is that I feel nice and refreshed today.

Today is out VP’s going away party. It’s at Morton’s Steakhouse. Sounds good. The Party starts at 4PM. I may go and dip out so I can go home early, but I have a feeling it will be fun. I have plans tonight, so I won’t be staying until six. He’d better like the wrapping on the department gift. I wrapped it, when a co worker came to me in distress because he had been asked to wrap it and freaked out when they handed him bows and ribbons. I made it look slamming.

So I’m listening to some really old Irish dance music right now. I bought the CD from the World Music section at Borders. Turns out it’s all recordings from the twenties and thirties. NICE. It’s all authentic sounding. Of course recording technology was no where near as rich or advanced as it is now, but it’s still nice that someone thought to preserve the music. I may go buy some more stuff today. I doubt it though. Not in the mood to go down to Borders.

I wonder if I should just wait to go to the party instead of going to lunch? Probably.

Weekend. ^_^

2006-10-02T09:50:00.000-04:00

Oh yeah. Weekend was good. hung out with Nikki, Dave and Rick. We ate sushi, scowled at emo kids in Severna Park and I even tagged a long to Chewpie's second vet appointment.

Here's a picture of Chewpie, by the way.

So I went shopping on Sunday with my mom. I didn't end up going to the Renn faire with Nikki because i just wasn't up to it, plus my gut was acting off and I had gas pains. I felt better a little later and went shopping with Jessi and mom. I got a book, two halloween themed teeshirts, a calander, and two bottles of perfume.

I really like the teeshirts.

We're going to go see Dismember tonight. We have A LOT of concerts this month.

EDIT: This entry is retarded. I couldn't get the text to stop wrapping around the picture, so I had to just hit enter about 40 times . How retarded is that?

So...Know all those times I was affected by chest pain when I'm upset?

2006-09-28T13:54:00.000-04:00

I'm one of those unlucky people that is physically affected by stress. Here are my exact stress related symptoms.

-Acute chest pain, usually around the heart.
-Shaking
-Jitters
-Slight nausea

I havne't quite figured out what helps it. I went for a rather strenuous power walk at lunch. My legs burned but only a very minimal amount of that jittery shakes was alieviated.

Eating calmed my tummy. I had sushi. Yum.

Hopefully, I won't start getting heart burn. Heartburn is the worst. I've never gotten it as a result of stress, but I was getting it rather frequently at the end of last year. Luckily, it seems to have gone bye bye.

So, this morning annoyed me.

I was looking for my bus ticket while grasping onto my earbuds for my MP3 player. They'd been tangled into a horrible knot and I'd untangled them as I was walking to the bus stop. I put them in the pocket of my purse so I could search for my ticket with more ease. i found it, the bus came and I got on it.

When I went to take out my player and listen to music. DUN DUN DUN...

THE EARBUDS ARE MISSING! Oh no! I mean I'm not too upset over it. yes, they were very expensive, but they are easily replacable. I'll get a new pair tomorrow.

Good news though. My custom frame order is complete. I bought this art print at the end of August and took it to get framed on the third. I'm picking up the finished product today.

I can't believe that I picked such an expensive hobby. My total frame order came to $92.00. Next time, I'll just get something custom matted so that it fits a standard Frame.

Tonight was pretty fun

2006-09-26T00:44:00.000-04:00

Rick, Dave Nikki and I all went out to meet Lindsey for her birthday at Rio Grande. I had a chicken quesadilla for dinner along with two bloody mary's.

After we all sat around and talked for a good long while, we went back to Nikki's and we all played very loud, four player Mario Cart Double Dash. So much fun. Cuss words flying, insults flying, bitching about blue shells and what not.

Fun times.

This week has been alright so far, though I only just finished with the first day of it. (By week, I speak of work week.) Last week was bad. I fucked up some flight reservations, had a bad fall at work, and left my ATM card in a bank machine (It's all straightened out.)

So this week has to be better.

I have a huge bruise on my thigh from where I fell.

AVAST YE SCOUNDRELS!

2006-09-19T08:57:00.000-04:00

IT BE TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY. YARR!

Coma White - Marilyn Manson

2006-09-13T11:03:00.000-04:00

There's something cold and blank behind her smile
She's standing on an overpass
In her miracle mile
[coma:]
"You were from a perfect world
A world that threw me away today
Today to run away"

A pill to make you numb
A pill to make you dumb
A pill to make you anybody else
But all the drugs in this world
Won't save her from herself

Her mouth was an empty cut
And she was waiting to fall
Just bleeding like a polaroid that
Lost all her dolls
[coma:]
"You were from a perfect world
A world that threw me away today
Today to run away"

A pill to make you numb
A pill to make you dumb
[chorus repeat]

The wound is healed, and I think I can finally forgive and let you go for good.

FINALLY! They leave me alone.

2006-09-13T09:10:00.000-04:00

In this case, THEY are all the obnoxious, flyer toting campaigners that have been plaguing the Shady Grove metro station for the past month.

Hopeful politicians and thier groupies gathered in startling numbers at the Shady Grove Metro, and I have no doubt, other metro stations near residential communities.

I was sick of the trash. Some people are just too submissive to say, "No thank you" to those who hand out flyers, and then sheepishly drop them by 'accident' or plain toss them on the ground. Those who actually care, stuff them in the already overflowing trash cans. I'm sure the metro staff got sick of it too.

Yesterday was really bad, because of primaries of course. I had to weave in an out of at least 7 different people handing out flyers and the politicians they were supporting, standing there waving like a bunch of plastic, smiling jackasses.

But all in all, it's all name recognition, I suppose.

Personally, I just want to be left alone in the morning.

The Crocodile Hunter is dead!

2006-09-04T10:10:00.000-04:00

:(

I really liked him. Learned a lot from his shows. I actually wanted to go meet him one day if I ever took a trip to Australia.

Well, This is going to be a quick entry.

2006-09-03T11:43:00.000-04:00

I posted an entry on the 26th, but it was only showing up in my edit window, and not on the actual blog itself.

So Yeah. Nikki got a new puppy. It's a puggle. HIS NAME IS CHEWPIE. He's so cute.

Things have been going alright for me. We're getting closer to me getting the house. Sweet. Just need all the paperwork to go through.

This expirience has taught me to keep my shit organized.I bought an expanding pocket file organizer, so I can seperate everything monthly. Bills, Bank statements, paystubs and all that happy shit will be sorted monthly.Oh yes. I will be organized. And it will happen, like peanut butter sandwiches happened to Don King.

That made no sense.

Anyway, I got a new MP3 player. FINALLY. I've been talking about it for months.

I got a Creative Zen Vision M. It's a 30 gig player, black with LCD color display.

That's what it looks like. Click on it to go to the creative website for more information on the item.

I got it at a good bargain from Circuit City. With tax, it came to $283.

Moby Dick

2006-08-23T08:35:00.000-04:00

I started reading Moby Dick back at the end of July. A month later, I'm almost 200 pages in. If I read more than while riding the bus and metro, I'd probably be halfway through.

The first few chapters were boring, aside from that famous opening, "Call me Ishmael."

I admit, I've skipped chapters. The book was written over 150 years ago, and somethings that are common knowledge today were probably not so among most readers of the era, especially those inland. Like the Chapter on Cetology. Yes. Thank you Mr. Melville, I do know what a whale is, and I'm aware of why they were hunted and what ambergrise and blubber and the oils and bones were used for. I also skipped the Sermon chapter for obvious reasons, as well as it doing nothing to advance the plot.

It's really picked up. Ahab and Starbuck have had thier words. I've noticed Melville's writing style has shifted drastically. The past few chapters have read like a play, and less like a novel. Ahab and Starbuck were given thier own chapters, devoted entirely to soliloquy.

I visualize Ahab as being very animated. His rousing speech to the crew involving the $16 gold piece he offered them held a lot of imagery (if you can understand the language style, which I do.) of him clutching at the shrouds as he spoke, his eyes manic, and pleased with how he easily raised the support of his crew.

The past chapter involving a scene with the crew at midnight, dancing, laughing and eventually disolving into an argument and fight was also easily visualized.

Queequeg has fallen from a main character into obscurity. I'm sure that he will resurface shortly, and I look forward to it, as he is my favorite character.

Nightmare House

2006-08-12T07:45:00.000-04:00

The dream I had before I woke up just now was none too normal. I played several parts into it. I was myself and two other people. I've never had a dream where I wasn't me.

I forget how it began or how we got there, but I was with my friend Dave V. at this house out in the middle of nowhere. The house was cursed and haunted by the ghost of a small girl who had been murdered there.

Dave fell under the curse when he decided to take up residence in the home which was liftable by simply leaving. He turned bright and he was animated like a realistic cartoon. I tried to show him his reflection in the only shiny surface that I could find, a television, but his reflection disappeared.

I kept seeing the little girl that haunted the house on and off. She had long black hair and was wearing a night gown, I guess sort of like the girl from The Ring.

She appeared in several places, in rooms, on televisions, around corners. She'd be cutting her wrists, gouging out her eyes and all kinds of fucked up things.

During his stay at the house, Dave and I were horsing around and found out that the front porch, which was about 5 feet off the ground and had a built in roof as a part of the house was actually a flat bed rail car, with its own track. It moved easily when the brakes weren't applied and to be funny, he removed the brakes. The car rolled into me with freat velocity, pushing me to the edge of the property, into a chain that hung across a forgotten and completely overgrown path. I fell down into the brush and started yelling. Dave chuckled and moved the car back to the house again. I got up and walked back, glad that the brush hadn't been thorny.

The next part of the dream I remember, I was a woman laying in bed at the house with her husband. This is where the nightmare starts. Dave was no longer in the dream and I didn't think about him at all.

I was a woman laying in my bed with my husband. We were making small talk, about a tattoo on his leg and how no hair grew with in the lines of the tattoo and about his new job promotion to some religious appointing. He said Cardinal, but that wouldn't make sense, since that is a position in the Catholic church.

Me (as the woman) and her husband started kissing, and had we been left to our own devices, we would have had sex.

I started to see the little ghost girl appear in the room by the door. Her face looked distraught, as if seeing people doing this to each other was something she could not handle. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore her.

The next instant, I was dragged from the bed, (I was still the woman) by a family of people. For some reason, they had been contracted by the givernment to kill me. (as the woman.)

My role in the dream shifted so I again became myself and I saw what was happening to this woman. They dragged her to the front porch and tied her up, a rope around each limb and began to pull each limb in opposite directions while she was suspended in mid air by the tension in the ropes. She screamed angrily. I realized that they were going to draw and quarter her. (That is how I identified it in the dream. This is incorrect. Drawing and Quarting entails a far more gruesome torture and execution. Mel Gibson was drawn and quartered in Braveheart. I am not sure of the name of the actual torture involved. I tried looking it up, but to no avail.)

I jumped up on the porch, grabbed an empty bottle and took it to the first member of the family. She was a black girl, though the rest of the family did not appear to be black. I cracked her around the skull and she just laughed at me, picked up a bottle of her own and cracked me around the hear too. I got angry and jabbed her in the boob. She grabbed my tit in an attempt to embarass and distract me. I in turn tore off her shirt and sucked on her nipple. She was virginal and had never been touched by anyone. She became distracted enough that I was able to knock her out, but I blacked out as well.

In the dream I woke up on the porch. I was a little boy, more importantly, the little boy of the woman that was being tortured.

Everything was quiet, and it was night. The people from the family that maimed the woman were sleeping around me. I didn't understand why they didn't do anything to me, or how I'd gotten there. I looked around me. Part of the porch was gone, along with the rail car and the track. What was left of the porch was actually part of the house. The ground was soft and wet from a recent rain where the track should have been. I didn't think it was strange in the dream that the track was gone.

I looked to where my mother (the woman) had been suspended by the ropes. She was no where in sight. In the failing light of a property flood light on top of a long post on a fence, I tried to visually scour the ground from the ledge on the porch to see if I could find blood or body bits. The ground was disturbed in a place or two, but there was no sign of my mother or blood. It was obvious by some torn and ripped wooden planks that part of the porch had been taken out.

I jumped down off the porch, and ran around and inbetween two buildings on the property and took off into the night, running as fast as I could. The sheet that was on top of me when I woke up got slightly caught on my clothing, but easily freed itself as I ran. The light from the property flood soon receded and I was left running in pure darkness away from the house. There was no light of any kind.

I kept running. I thought to myself that I may step on something, or run right into a tree, since I could see nothing and had no light source.

Eventually, I was running with my hands out in front of me. I ran through a small patch of sapling trees, and navigated through them by waving my arms in front of me and grabbing the trunks and swingng out of their way.

Eventually, I realized that I had been running with my eyes closed, since there was no point to keeping them open in the pitch black night. When I opened them, I found myself in a small townhouse neighborhood. It was barely light, and the sky was still a misty purple. The sun hadn't come up yet, but sunrise was very soon and I could see again. I knew that it was about a 20 minute walk from the house that I just left. I also somehow had a dog with me. (Shh. I know the time table makes no sense. It was a dream. Don't argue with me.)

There must have been an all night block party, because there were other children running about and playing, and a small smattering of adults walking around. It seemed more like it was dusk and the sun had just set than it being near sunrise.

Instead of running to someone and asking for help, I continued running through the neighborhood. I kept noticing a small plane in the sky, circling over the neighborhood. I stopped and looked up at it, and watched in horror as in turned in the sky and began to dive headed right towards me.

It was an old WWI propeller plane, yet it made no noise as it decended. People began screaming and running.

As it decended, it became huge, larger than any other plane that I have ever seen. I ran as fast as I could and darted inbetween two rows of houses. Behind there, I found a brick paved alley. It was narrow and almost seemed european, with its uneven surface and connected alleys that popped up conviniently when you needed a new direction to run.

However, no matter where I ran, I was still visible from the side. Either this side, or that would be open to the air, and the plane could see me.

This is when the yelling started. I recognized the voice as the 'mother' of the 'family' that had been contracted to torture mine.

"Where are you? Where are you, you little shit?" she screamed angrilly from the plane. I still heard no plane or engine noises, only her booming voice.

Finally in the alley, abandoning the dog somehow, I found a white door and doorframe that led to a courtyard. I stood against the brick alley wall behind the door and held it as tight agaisnt me as I possibly could, smashing myself between the wall and the door, in a final attempt to hide.

When I woke up, I realized the pressure of the door, had actually been the presure of me lying stomach down on the bed, with my face turned to the side. It was exactly how I was standing behind the door in the dream.

I will have you know that this took an entire hour to type up.

Started 6:47AM. Finished 7:45AM

Ozzfest 2006

2006-08-07T10:48:00.000-04:00

^_^!

Yesterday, Nikki, Rick, Debbie, Andrea and I packed intro Nikki's Scion and went to Ozzfest 2006 at Nissan Pavillion. We tailgated in the parking lot until the cops came by and told us that it wasn't allowed.

As everyone knows, I am sensitive to heat and my mood turns really shitty when I am hot, so I did my best to keep a positive outlook and ignore the heat. It wasn't nearly as bad as it's been. Last week was smattered with record highs with heat indices well into the 110° range. Yesterday, it was about 92° with low(er) humidity. I combatted the heat by drinking tons of water, seeking shade and drenching my hair in water from the bathroom sinks. It helped a lot, and it was convinient that sweating as much as I did meant that even though I was drinking tons of water, I had to pee only once at the end of the night. I got a bit of a sunburn on my part, which I didn't notice until this morning when I got into the shower and the hot water touched my scalp and was all like, "OOOOOO! HA HA HA! YOU CRISPY FRIED!"

I also think it's just starting to peel too, because I went to scratch my head on the bus this morning non-chalantly and noticed a veritable shower of skin flakes. EW! I'm not used to that and will have to get some Head and Shoulders until it passes, I guess.

Yay! I got to see some bands. Not as many as last year. A lot of our group (including some other friends who drove down seperately) spent the afternoon in the shade. We were stalking a table in the shade of some small flowering trees. As soon as the people got up, Rick sat down with ninja like speed, and we quickly took over the table for a while.

We didn't get to see Ozzy. He was headlining on the second stage at 4:30. I think we were all a little too hot and tired to drag our asses over there.

We managed to catch Lacuna Coil, Avenge Sevenfold (They butchered Walk by Pantera), Hatebreed, Disturbed, and finally, System of a Down, who headlined the mainstage.

SOAD is breaking up or something? Egads! No! I'm not thier hugest fan. I have all of thier albums but Hypnotize (haven't gotten around to getting it yet.)

We left and headed home. Rawr. Nikki put on the Cranberries and I felt like screaming. Fucking Zombie was in my head this morning. That song irritates the hell out of me. I hate how she brays like a donkey throughout the song. OH-AH OH-AH OH-AH OH-AH. Then she put on Bjork, which was much better. I got home around 11:30, talked to my mother for a bit and hit the sack.

Crash and Burn.

2006-07-28T12:39:00.000-04:00

I'm slowly falling forward into myself. I piss off those around me continually, though not always on purpose. What remains of what I once was? What remains of the child that consumed me until well after adult hood.

Was she lost to sex? Maybe. I maintained her well until my twenties. My hyperactive antics, people's general annoyance with me when I got spastic.

It's dead now.

Nay to age and hymenal theories. I blame the drugs.

I have done none myself, they terrify me, and to be honest, I fear those who do. I feel as if I am a minority in this area. I'm not talking about weed. I've come to terms with that. There are more good people in the world who smoke weed once in a while than there are of good people who do not.

Does the same apply to coke fiends? Junkies? What about people all tweaked out on Mesculin, or fucked up on shrooms? I don't seem to think so. Is it only my own prejudiced? Is it not the same as fearing a person because they are Muslim? Or black? Or Chinese or anything but what you are?

EDIT: (I realized that I did not expound further on the reasoning behind my blame. Let me do so here. Short version. Fall in love with boyfriend. Boyfriend moves into apartment. Boyfriend gets deeply involved with drugs and drug dealers. Think I can change boyfriend or 'save him' from said situation. Fail to do so. It's been a deeply ingrained fear ever since. Life meant nothing to some of the people he was around. They'd kill you for looking at them wrong, and I was expected to be civil and hold conversations with them while they were weighing out crack rocks. No. Sorry. The boyfriend eventually cleaned himself up (I think?) years later)

I'm one of the rarest you'll find. I'm an athiest metal head who has never tried an illegal mind altering substance.

I've written about it, though. The entire beginning of the story I've been working on since I was 14 involves teenagers getting thier minds wacked the fuck out on tons of hallucinagens. It terrifies me, but I find it gripping. I found describing an acid trip was easier than I expected. How she could see the air currents part as she moved her hand through the humid night air. How her hand elongated into an elegant hand of vampiric complexion. How the sound of the wind blowing through the trees turned into gentle whispers of a thousand different voices.

I had several people who'd tried acid read it. They nodded their heads in approval. No pink elephants, only a girl who went into a bad trip and lost control, but in the end heard a small voice beckoning her to follow it. Leading her down the rabbit hole, so to speak. I have always liked the imagry of Alice's fall into Wonderland, and even the charater recognizes the similarities of her situation . Falling through a hole in a tree and waking up in a vast field of pastel colored wheat grass.

Even now, I get lost in the imagry of it, which is to say that though fearful, the curiosity is still there.

I find that I cope best with pretending that everyone is like me. I cope by pretending so and so is just like me. A little part of me is always shocked when I find out about someone's drug habits. A large part of me is elated when I find a similar soul to me.

So tell me why, why now am I retracting from everything? I should be working right now, but instead here I am. Blogging. What the fuck. I have work to do.

And Depression is gnawing at my earlobe again

2006-07-28T10:30:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, I really sit back and look at myself and think FAIL.

How have I failed exactly? I'm 26, I'm about to take over the mortgage on the house I grew up in since I was three and get a roommate and two lovely cats that I have wanted since I first started pondering to move out.

I've taken forever. I don't drive because I never got a liscence. My mother didn't want me getting one when I was a teenager, and now I see very little time to get one. 60 Hours of logged time behind the wheel of a car is easy to fake with about five different pens, but passing the test is another thing.

She's right. It's in a fucking parking lot. What's stopping me?

Also, I'm a fat ass. Lol. I don't understand kids, but who would expect me to? I didn't have younger siblings, or cousins to baby sit or take care of.

I babysat once when I was sixteen. The neighbor's kids. But I knew them well enough and they liked me so it wasn't really a chore. I spent the time playing with them.

I really have to wonder where the little voice in my head that tells me that I've failed at life comes from. If I was truley a failure, wouldn't I be addicted to some horrible drug that I couldn't afford, stripping or whoring for drugs, or even sleeping in a dumpster?

Think logically, Jaime.

I mean seriously. What the fuck? I suppose that's what chronic depression does. I've lived with it my whole life. You think I would recognize its ugly little face by now.

I find myself not wanting to go out. I force myself to do so anyway. I find myself not wanting to be around my own friends. I yet again force myself to do so. I suppose it's a form of self therepy. I can't give in and just sit at home all dammned day and sob into my fucking pillow can I? I have to get out there and take care of myself, and mingle, and work and act the happy part. It helps. I love my friends. I love being with them. It's not ME that makes me not want to be around them, it's a symptom of DEPRESSION. I don't have time to cater to it. I don't have time to wallow. I have to do my best, and ignore the emo bullshit.

I mean, christ. I've seen more psychologists and psychiatrists than I care to admit. I was treated for depression from the tender age of 9 and up. What the fuck makes a 9 year old with a good home, parents that don't hit her and allow her to run around and play depressed?

They had me on Anti- Depressants at 10 years old. I remember they were sugar coated. Dizipramine I think they were called. Probably off the market now. They were known to cause irregular heart functions. They had me hooked up to EKG machines every week, and determined that the medication was allowing the left ventrical in my heart to stay open too long, therefor letting too much blood into the heart.

Do you know what that feels like? It only takes a beat or two to regulate itself back to normal, but during that time, it's a sharp chest pain made worse by breathing. Movement makes it even more painful. It stops you in your tracks.

Yeah. They said it was a temporary side effect. I still get them, over 16 years later, it still happens. And now that I'm fat, I just imagine the cholestorol clogging in my veins and see myself getting worse.

That's why I joined the gym. I should go there this weekend and work out. The main thing I would like to focus on is cardio. It's what I am most worried about, so I will be content with just going there and riding one of the bikes or walking on the treadmill for an hour.

I also don't want to over work myself. That's bad too.

My weekend of sex, drugs, murder, romance, mystery and hot bitches.

2006-07-25T10:22:00.000-04:00

HA. Do you actually think I would have a weekend like that?

But it was a busy, busy weekend.

Friday we were all hanging out at Firehouse. Nikki was helping out. I was so tired Friday night. I don't like being tired.

Saturday was fun. I spent an hour or two at the MVA to get my new permit. After that, I was dropped back off at home to chop the yard vegetation back to a reasonable height, and do a bit of picking up. Admittedly, I spent more time on the computer than cleaning, and Nikki came by with Brittney and Asia and helped me finish up.

We ran over to Firehouse for a little bit. I started showing Brittney how to play pool. She kept complaining that she sucked. I kept pointing out that it was her first time and that it takes a lot of practice to get good at it. I also told her boys find it hot when women can smoke them in pool. That seems to perk her interest.

We all went out with Un (She owns Firehouse.) to Yakura (I think that's what it is called.) which is a really nice sushi place next to the Germantown Fitness First. We met Rick there and sat inside. Eventually Sandy, then James and some other chick showed up. We also saw Ariel and her Fiance

It was some of the best sushi I've ever had. Everyone kept throwing hunks of stuff from their plate onto mine. I was like, "Kay? Lol." It was all delicious.

After that, Nikki and I ran down to Sam's Club and helped her do the shopping. We got everything loaded into her truck, and she managed to jigsaw puzzle it all together.

Nikki and I left once everything was inside Firehouse to get showered and changed. Asia wanted to go see Tomm at Tiki Bar, so we loaded her and Brittney into the car and dragged them over to Kentlands. The place was deserted, so no Tomm. Nikki drove them over to Shoppers, got them some ice cream and dropped them back off at the house. She and I then headed back over to Firehouse to watch Sanctuary, an Iron Maiden tribute band.

Nathan, one of the bar tenders who actually grew up in one of the houses behind me, made Nikki and I a giant pitcher of Long Island Iced Tea. He made it really strong. Nikki made faces and started pouring coke back in there. She amuses me. Every time I turned my head, she would pour more of her Long Island into my cup. The last few times, she wasn't even trying to be slick about it. :D

However, we were both so exhausted that we only stayed for an hour, headed back to her place and passed the hell out while Rick watched The Big Labowski. A few hours later, I woke up with a headache so I stumbled around Nikki's room into her bathroom, peed, took some pain relievers and crashed for the night.

Sunday Nikki and Tomm worked the bar in the afternoon at Firehouse. I hung out with her, leaving once with Rick to go get sushi. After all that, Tomm picked up his girlfriend and we went to Jaxx to catch the tail end of a metal show. Vile was playing, and damn they were good, but we came in on the ass end of their set.

And that was my weekend.

Sounds of the Underground

2006-07-19T13:27:00.000-04:00

So Nikki, Rick, Tomm, Jessi and I went out to Merriweather Pavilion on Monday for the Sounds of the Underground tour. It was a fun time. I got to see Gwar, In Flames, The Black Dahlia Murder, Behemoth, Trivium, Cannibal Corpse and a bunch of others play.

Of course, being an outdoor show, it was hot as balls outside. I got sprayed in the face with blue water during Gwar. Tom was in the pit, so he was drenched when their set was over.

I’m glad that Jessi could go with us. We were worried about space and other things, and I have horrible communication skills and almost screwed Jessi out of a ticket, but it all worked out.

Nikki got her new car. She got a Scion. I was shocked at first. I remember when they first came out she and I talked about how ugly they were, but she’s right. When you actually sit in it, and see it close up and whatnot, it’s actually pretty cute. I only sat in it for a minute.

We all went out to Tokyo Lighthouse on Saturday? Sunday? I forget which, but Jessi had never been to a hibachi restaurant before, so I wanted to drag her with me. I was all like OMG and she was like O RLY?

I skipped my period last month. I spotted for two days and it never came. I thought my birth control was supposed to regulate that shit like clockwork. Damn. I’m also running out. I need to call up the hotline tonight and get more mailed out to me. I also need to schedule doctor appointments, and dentist to get my teeth yanked and all kinds of shit.

I should also go get my eyes examined. I had just graduated high school last time I had it done. Doesn’t seem like it was that long ago, because I do the fake me out ones at the DMV every year, but it’s been 8 years.

I also need to go there this weekend and get a new permit. I don’t know why I keep bothering, honestly.